30 Niki Facts

Something I copied from Facebook:


1. Let's start off with my name. The name that my parents gave me is Alyssa Nicole Yokingco. Take note that my last name is spelled with a C-O, not a K-O. Alright? A lot of people get it wrong. Plus Alyssa is pronounced as "ali-sah", not "alay-sah". Alright? Most friends call me Niki. Single K, please take note of that. Kthnxbye. Haha. But some call me Niks, Nikita, Nikitita, etc.
2. I'm confused as what to earn for first: a car or my tuition fee for Graduate School...
3. ...which leads us to one of my ultimate dreams: to earn a doctorate degree in Philosophy and then teach Philosophy somewhere. Plus "Alyssa Nicole E. Yokingco, M.A., Ph.D" doesn't sound that bad, either. ;)
4. I'm sure most people know this, but did you know that Tito Bo was one of the main reasons that I took up Philosophy? I looked up to him, how he preached, and how he wrote, and thought that Philosophy could probably turn me into something like him one day. Well, I thought wrong.
5. If given the chance, though, I would love to take up Music as a second degree. I actually was planning to shift to that course after my first year in Philosophy, but a few friends told me not to push through because of some reasons that I'm afraid I can't divulge to you, dearest reader/tagged friend.
6.I love to sing. VERY MUCH SO. A day does not go by without me singing a full song. And yes, I still sing even though I've lost my voice. I sing pretty much everywhere. Hahaha.
7. I play the guitar... Well, not that much anymore. And I want to learn how to play the drums. BADLY. Anyone willing to teach me?
8. I love to write. Really. About the most random things. I like to jot down what I'm thinking about, or what I think about a certain topic or a certain issue just to continuously sharpen my mind. I'm not sure if writing likes me back, though.
9. I have perfectly straight teeth (according to a dentist/friend). Nope, I didn't really have braces for a period of my time. My mom just taught me a neat trick on how to make my teeth grow straight.
10. I have this unexplainable obsession over journals/notebooks. I buy more than what I need. I used to tell myself that it was because of my passion for writing (and me immediately filling up the journal) that I should every now and then buy a new one. But now I think I'm being just plain silly and magastos.
11. I love stars. Seriously. I would literally jump for joy if you gave me ANYTHING that had stars or maybe even a bottle of those paper folded stars *hint, hint*. That being said, I love pictures of the galaxy. I will continuously be amazed at how wonderful the universe is.
12. I have anger management issues. Seriously. Something so simple can instantly flare me up. Yes, it is one of my weaknesses: I am definitely not that patient, either. And, believe me, you wouldn't want to see me angry.
13. I don't know how to hold grudges. Seriously. It may seem like I will be eternally mad at you, but nope. Just leave me alone for a couple of minutes, then I'll be okay. But if you continue to press the issue and bug me, then sorry, you shall experience my wrath.
14. If you mean something to me, or if you are important to me, I will see to it that I will be there when you need me. That means our friendship is important to me and I hate seeing you sad or problematic. Capice?
15. THAT being said, I treasure my friendships. If I say you are my friend, I mean it. With every single cell of my body.
16. I have low tolerance for physical pain. Seriously. Sometimes, a gentle slap for you may mean hell for me. Oo na, ako na ang maarte. Che. I hate having check-ups and I definitely hate something being pushed into my skin. I am AFRAID of needles. There was a time that I almost fainted while I was being injected.
17. I am now officially a philosophy book hoarder. Recently, I had this thing about collecting philosophical readings so that I won't have to photocopy that much when I start going to Gradschool. If you're going to ask me if I actually read the things that I buy, well, let's just say that I'm trying (and apparently failing).
18. When I was 3, I was rushed to the hospital because I ate a piece of poison from the cockroach hotel. And I remember it all too vividly: I ate it because I thought it was a piece of chocolate cake. DON'T JUDGE ME. Hahaha.
19. I have thunder thighs (THERE, I SAID IT). And I got it from my father, obviously.
20. One thing that I would never say no to is chocolate.
21. There was actually one point in my life that I wanted to become a pre-school teacher. Actually, sometimes, I still want to be.
22. When I'm all alone at home, I dance. As in really dance. Well, actually, I still dance even though my mother's around. She finds it highly amusing. And it's not because I'm very good in dancing, it's actually because I look rather awkward and funny when I do.
23. Even though it may not seem like it, I would love to wear dresses. Deep inside, I can be really girly, too. Heh.
24. Another thing I can never say no to is ice cream. And just so you know, two of my favorite flavors are mint chocolate chip and vanilla. Give me a scoop and I will be your best friend for life.
25. I've always wanted to try a pixie cut. Unfortunately, though, because of my round face, I can't. It'll make me look like a chipmunk.
26. In my spare time (and let's just say that for now, I have a lot of it), I doodle. I doodle a lot, actually. But that doesn't mean that I'm not listening to what you have to say. It's just that I like to keep my hands busy.
27. I can be very moody. One minute I can be all, "tralalala I love you", and then the next I could be, "Please die." Blame the hormones.
28. I love chicken. Really. Kahit anong luto, basta manok, game ako. I also love salmon sashimi and Mcdo's french fries.
29. Most of the people already know this, I've been homeschooled for 4 years: from Grade 3 to Grade 6. No, it's not because I have some kind of disability. Homeschooling is not all about that. And well, let's just say I don't regret my parents's decision to homeschool me. Why? Because it's brought us closer to each other.
30. Lastly, the only dish that I've mastered is that natural tomato-based pasta. And I'm proud to say that my customers (i.e. my family and my boyfriend) are satisfied. Tee-hee.

Of Taking It Back.

Yes, I take it back.

Yes, I am not afraid anymore.

I was immature. Maybe because I was so caught up in thinking of myself, that I forgot that you have a say in all of this, that you can do something about it, about us. And that I should put my trust in you, in the strength that we both have to not make the worse happen.

I take it back and place firm trust in you.

In us.

Of Loneliness.

Loneliness tends to manifest itself in your most vulnerable moments: moments when you're alone, when all you're doing is typing a supposedly random blog entry when suddenly, out of nowhere, a big wave of loneliness hits you. And it hits you HARD. And obviously, it's hit me right now.

This has always been my greatest fear: to be alone even though you are in a sea of people. It's not just because wala kang kasama, it's more like kahit may kasama ka, mag-isa ka pa rin.. Na parang wala kang matakbuhan even though there are a lot of people more than willing to listen. It's like nobody knows how you feel, and even though you let it out, it still isn't enough.

I'm not trying to ask for sympathy. I'm not trying to look kawawa in front of other people's eyes. I know I'll be okay. It's just that sometimes, I can't just keep this inside of me. And this blog is my outlet, my escape.

Lord, shine Your light through my loneliness. Shatter this heavy feeling and work Your way in me.

Of a Little Something for a Certain Someone

I am going to warn those who hate cheesy letters/poems/entries/what have you because this entry is.

Actually, this is supposed to be a song of some sorts, but it keeps on sounding more like a letter rather than a song, so obviously, I FAILED BIG TIME. Hahaha. So here, it is.

Dear you,

I may not have the right words to say all the time, or I may not be able to make you smile every time that you start feeling like crap, but when all words fail, I am ready to listen. I will always be here for you, I always have been. And I'll continue to be, no matter what the circumstances are. If I fail to live up to this promise, slap me, please, because I can be a little bit out of it sometimes.

This is one of my many ways of showing you that I love you, and that I care. And I know that you know all of this already, but I just wanted to make sure by saying it over and over again. Even when you feel like no one else is there for you, I was, I am, and I will always be.

Alyssa Nicole Yokingco, M.A., Ph.D

...SOON. :)

Well... Maybe after, let's say, 10 years. HAHAHA.

Of a Getaway.

I know it sounds wrong to quote a Hilary Duff song, but hey, my blog, my thoughts, and yes, MY preference of quotable quotes:

Gotta make a getaway
The traffic in my brain is
Drivin' me insane
This is more than I can take

YES. I need to get away. I need to just fly away somewhere. I'm sad, confused, and lost.

YES, I'm being emo. What do you care?